Three Man Booth

I want Teddy Long to be a Playable Character in the next Tekken Tag Tournament.

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:45:31 -0400

I want Teddy Long to be a Playable Character in the next Tekken Tag Tournament.

The Shield jumps Kofi until Randy Orton’s music plays Orton: Runs down Wait guys! Let me...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:41:12 -0400

*The Shield jumps Kofi until Randy Orton’s music plays*

Orton: *Runs down* Wait guys! Let me join in on the Kofi jumping too!

Chris Jericho proves to Big Show why he was WWE’s Musical Chairs Champion.

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:12:03 -0400

Chris Jericho proves to Big Show why he was WWE’s Musical Chairs Champion.

Not sure if Big Show lost by countout or just gave up because he didn’t want to run.

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:07:27 -0400

Not sure if Big Show lost by countout or just gave up because he didn’t want to run.

Daniel Bryan could have 0 Life in a Zelda game and he STILL wouldn’t be a weak Link....

Fri, 24 May 2013 20:29:44 -0400

Daniel Bryan could have 0 Life in a Zelda game and he STILL wouldn’t be a weak Link. He’s THAT good.

Highlight Reel: Goat Of Personality

Thu, 23 May 2013 12:09:00 -0400

In Highlight Reel, 3MB will look at funny and interesting wrestling videos

YouTube is celebrating “Comedy Week,” an event that brings together comedy of all stream-able formats. YouTube has served as a great avenue for funny people to showcase their talents through jokes, skits, rants and it has also been fertile ground for media manipulation like auto-tuning and hypercutting videos. And wrestling has a place in this, right? I mean, the WWE proudly considers itself entertainment for everyone, having moments of action, drama, suspense and comedy in a single episode of Monday Night RAW. Their YouTube Channel, WWEFanation, is no stranger to comedy; it was practically born from Zack Ryder’s comical / editorial outlook on his own career trajectory in Z! True Long Island Story. Since that moment it has spawned several comedy shows: Are You Serious? The JBL ~~and Cole~~ Show, Santino’s Foreign Exchange, the list goes on (Editor’s Note: Actually, it doesn’t). So what is the WWE’s contribution to comedy week?

Goats singing “Cult of Personality” the entrance theme of CM Punk which is indicative of a few things.

Just to spite this video, CM Punk isn’t coming back. Ever.
Apparently, someone replaced every mention of the name “Daniel Bryan” with “Goat” in the WWE archives.
Apparently, someone really thinks CM Punk loves Goats:

Lastly, CM Punk Is Not Impressed

Happy Comedy Week, Everyone!

One day Triple H will help out Curtis Axel (From our RAW Recap)

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:01:37 -0400

One day Triple H will help out Curtis Axel (From our RAW Recap)

Jeri-Troll! (From our RAW Recap)

Wed, 22 May 2013 13:01:33 -0400

Jeri-Troll! (From our RAW Recap)

Politically Correct AJ Lee (From our RAW Recap)

Wed, 22 May 2013 12:02:56 -0400

Politically Correct AJ Lee (From our RAW Recap)

We know, Seth. We know…(From our RAW Recap)

Wed, 22 May 2013 11:01:25 -0400

We know, Seth. We know…(From our RAW Recap)

Triple H was suffering from “Goku’s Heart...

Wed, 22 May 2013 10:01:35 -0400

Triple H was suffering from “Goku’s Heart Disease” during his match with Curtis Axel (From our RAW Recap)

Ryback dresses like he’s in The Warriors (From our RAW...

Wed, 22 May 2013 09:01:33 -0400

Ryback dresses like he’s in The Warriors (From our RAW Recap)

3MB RAW Recap: 05/20/13

Wed, 22 May 2013 00:28:09 -0400

RAW begins with…an ambulance?

WELCOME TOO MONDAY NIGHT RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

An ambulance? Well, it’s no helicopter… or beer truck… or even milk truck. #raw
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

Ryback gets out of the ambulance.

An ambulance with the siren on coming into the arena. IT’S OBVIOUSLY SCOTT STI—-oh Ryback.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Beanie Ryback in a WAMBulance.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

It’s like Ryback steals peoples wardrobe. Triple H’s vest, HBK’s beanie. FEED.HIM.CLOTHES
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

Why does Ryback look like an extra from The Warriors?
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Ryback tells the WWE Universe that his Last Man Standing match with John Cena at Extreme Rules was ruled a “No Contest.” Ryback says John Cena may have walked away with the WWE Championship, but he didn’t walk away, he was carried away.

Look, The Ryback is The Doomsday to John’s SuperCena. But Even Superman Sold The Injuries for More Than 20 Minutes, Cena.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Ryback used all 48 points in CAW Mode for that attire.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Ryback brings up that John Cena refused to be put in an ambulance but guarantees next time, Cena won’t refuse. Ryback claims he’s not standing out here on an ambulance to look cool, he’s on the ambulance to challenge John Cena at WWE Payback in an Ambulance Match.

That’s Okay, The Ryback: No One Thought You Looked Cool Standing On Top of the Ambulance.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

First a strap match and now an ambulance match. If a buried alive match doesn’t happen this year I’m calling bs.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Ryback guarantees that he’ll throw John Cena in the back of an ambulance and to the medical facility just like the WWE Universe, who is “eventually going.” Ryback goes on a tirade on the WWE Universe and claims they’re fat, pathetic weak weak WEAK people of society who will eventually go to the morgue and claims that he has nothing in common with the WWE Universe.

This promo started off so well. Ryback is now super-morbid and telling me I have to visit doctors. #RAW
— D. O’Brien (@Heinekenrana) May 21, 2013

Entrance with sirens and a rant about fat, weak people. And it’s not Scott Steiner!
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

Idk Ryback, I think your dress sense has a lot in common with some wrestling fans. That’s not a compliment. #raw
— Kara (@karaadora) May 21, 2013

“You wake up with no goals and no direction.” - Ryback”I wake up with One Direction! *Looks at a poster of Zayne*” - WWE/One Direction Fan
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

“You Have No Idea How Much Hard Work It Is To Look Cool While Standing on top of an Ambulance!” - The Ryback
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Ryback says that the WWE Universe has nothing in common with John Cena. Ryback says they know nothing about nutrition, education and that at Payback he will take all of us to the morgue with John Cena.

Okay, why is Ryback threatening to kill us all? That doesn’t make me want to keep watching @wwe
— Shay Mitchell (@ShayLMitchell) May 21, 2013

So is Ryback going to kill everyone and send them to the morgue? I’m trying to figure out where he was going with that.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Ryback says that there is only one fact in life and that it’s “Ryback Rules!”

Ryback RUUUUUUUUULES lmao What a fifth grader insult!
— Angélica Andrade(@angie_chipz) May 21, 2013

Ryback should stick to three syllable sentences.
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

Ryback is going through his American Badass phase. He will snap out of it when he gets older. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Match 01: Fandango and Wade Barrett vs. Chris Jericho and The Miz

Summer Rae changes clothes. Fandango doesn’t. Eeek.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Wade Barrett comes out with new music!

Wade Barrett Changed His Theme? “I Don’t Care Anymore”
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Barrett has a new theme? Love it already!! Much better. Now that’s an upgrade!!
— Shay Mitchell (@ShayLMitchell) May 21, 2013

A rejected Linkin Park song!
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Wade Barrett Upgraded His Theme to an ROH Level of Aggression!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

If The Miz had any self-awareness he’d be a little embarrassed by his t-shirts but he doesn’t.
— Mark Greg Sputnik (@TimWelcomed) May 21, 2013

Jericho and Miz on the same team? So freaking happy right now. Like seriously, I might just explode.
— Shay Mitchell (@ShayLMitchell) May 21, 2013

Jacketcho is here.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Jericho and the Jerichoette
— Apparently Alex(@failraiser) May 21, 2013

Chris Jericho and The Miz Unite to Form the Team “Team Jericho”
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Fandango’s pants are confirmed to be a next generation Pokemon.
— Mark Greg Sputnik (@TimWelcomed) May 21, 2013

During the match, Fandango leaves the ring then starts dancing with Summer Rae.

Thank you Fandango for stopping Miz’s Figure Four.
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

Fandango is a Pretty Good Tag Team Partner. He’s Giving Wade Barrett a Rest Period Right Now.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Wade Barrett gets destroyed by The Miz and Chris Jericho.

Fandango’s Theme Music: Wade Barrett’s Only Weakness.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Wade Barrett, going through the selling motions while wondering if the marine biologist market has picked back up. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

Winners: Chris Jericho and The Miz

You left England for this, Wade Barrett. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

I really enjoyed watching Wade Barrett get destroyed while Fandango’s music was playing. The music turned the beatdown into art. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Chris Jericho and The Miz stare at Fandango and Summer Rae then leave the ring.

Jericho, you know what you must do: DANCE WITH THE MIZ NOW. #RAW
— D. O’Brien (@Heinekenrana) May 21, 2013

Fandango runs for his life knocking down a fan!

Fandango just murdered a dude on his way out.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Fandango Miguel’d a fan.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Chris Jericho and Summer Rae share a moment and get closer. Jericho takes Summer Rae’s hand then spins her into his arms and dips her. Jericho almost kisses her but he laughs, gives her the hand then walks off.

Oh snap! Summer Rae just talked to the hand! #90sinsults
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

Ladies and gents, JeriTroll! #RAW
— D. O’Brien (@Heinekenrana) May 21, 2013

Vickie Guerrero walks out and decides that Jack Swagger will compete in a match and anyone who downloaded the WWE App will get to choose his opponent:

After all this years and Vickie G still doesn’t have a theme song. Just an “Excuse me”.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Jack Swagger, The WWE App’s Favorite Wrestler.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

The choices are: The Great Khali, R-Truth, or Randy Orton

Gee. I wonder who’s going to win that one.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

My choices are The Great Khali, R-Truth, or Randy Orton? This is sicker and more twisted than the Theon torture scenes. #raw #gameofthrones
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

Backstage: Daniel Bryan is upset when Kane walks up to him and asks if he’s ready. Bryan says it finally hit him that neither he nor Kane are “The Tag Team Champions.” Kane tells Bryan that the negativity is not productive. Bryan calls Kane out on his “Embrace The Hate” campaign then says he feels naked without the titles. Kane brings up the fact that Bryan wears no shirt or pants. Bryan asks Kane how he can make jokes and Kane responds that he’s confident and Daniel Bryan should be too. Kane tries to tell Daniel Bryan that he can’t show any weakness but Daniel Bryan and Kane get into an argument until Kofi Kingston separates them. Bryan tells his teammates he’ll see them out there then walks off.

Marriage Counselor Variant Kofi. #RAW
— D. O’Brien (@Heinekenrana) May 21, 2013

Kofi is Definitely the weak link of this team. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Just run away from him and do your own thing, Daniel Bryan.
— Mark Greg Sputnik (@TimWelcomed) May 21, 2013

That beard is beginning to have a serious gravitational effect on Bryan’s face.
— jeremy (@jeremyExiled) May 21, 2013

Match 02: Sheamus vs. Titus O’Neil

OH JOY #SCUMBAGSHEAMUS
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Tyler Perry Presents: Primetime Players
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

I Bet Titus O’Neil Wishes He Was Back on the Pre-Show Right Now.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Is Sheamus’ new gimmick just him beating up black people?
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

I can totally see Titus O’Neil as an awesome champ someday. He could be like Sheamus but likeable. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Titus O’Neil actually gets some solid offense in!

When did Titus become a primetime player? (Pun intended)
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

It’s VERY nice to see Titus getting all this offense though.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Technically, Sheamus and Titus O’Neil Should Be Afraid of Each Other.Titus: Oh No! A Ghost!Sheamus: Oh No! A Shadow!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Winner: Sheamus

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Paul Heyman Reaveals The Newest Paul Heyman Guy:

I Read on @3manbooth That The Newest Member Of Paul Heyman’s Stable is Miguel: bit.ly/13CPxsX
— LeKeith (@lekeithlewis) May 20, 2013

Let’s hope Heyman’s new client is better at preventing his manager from getting punched in the face and given the pedigree. #RAW
— Stacey Heisenbert (@LittleSherbie) May 21, 2013

Paul Heyman says when it’s a Paul Heyman guy that exposes your heroes, he gets all the boos then encourage the boos. Heyman asks the WWE Universe what it feels like to be powerless then reminds the fans about Brock Lesnar defeating Triple H at Extreme Rules then reminds everyone that Triple H will go down in history as a loser.

Paul Heyman’s 3rd guy is Heath Slater. It has to be. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

I can’t boo you, Paul. You’re an genius and I want you to adopt me.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

“… a Looooseeer” That Settles It. Paul Heyman’s Newest Client: Ace Ventura, Pet Detective.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Paul Heyman says Brock Lesnar fulfilled his obligations and wonders what he’s going to talk about now. Heyman says it’s time for something new and different. Heyman claims that it’s a Sportscenter/Youtube clip moment and that we’re all here tonight to witness history. Heyman introduces his newest Paul Heyman Guy…The former Michael McGillicutty, Curt Axel?!

Oh my friggin god YESSS
— Chris Riddle (@ChrisRiddle) May 21, 2013

But … I Was a McGillibuddy …
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

The new Paul Heyman guy is MR PERFECT’S SON. Yes! #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

That is one guy that can benefit from Heyman’s managing.
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

Michael McGuilicutty looks 100000x more impressive without David Otunga next to him. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Poor Curt Hawkins. He’s not the only Curt anymore.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Couldn’t be happier for the former @wwemcgillicutty …& don’t worry about me guys. Nobody has ever refered to me as “Curtis”. I’m ok. #RAW
— Curt Hawkins (@TheCurtHawkins) May 21, 2013

Curtis Axel’s music is a remix of Mr. Perfect’s theme.

I REALLY like the Mr Perfect remix though, wow.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

I’m Not Loving the (Re)-Debut of Curtis Axel But I Am LOVING This Mr. Perfect Theme Remix!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

I’m pretty sure you can buy this mix of “Exodus” on Wrestlemania: The Album, available now and in 1994 on cassette! #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

Paul Heyman hypes up Curtis Axel saying that the WWE Universe proved him right again with the reaction. Heyman claims Brock Lesnar and CM Punk got the same reactions when he first debuted them. Heyman continues to hype up Curtis Axel until Triple H interrupts.

Oh no….poor Curtis Axel…
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

THIS IS NOT GREAT RUN AXEL RUN
— Mark Greg Sputnik (@TimWelcomed) May 21, 2013

“New talent, huh? Good thing I brought my shovel.” - Triple H
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Triple H tells Paul Heyman that he can whip up a batch of Koolaid until Curtis Axel interrupts him. Triple H tells Axel that the adults are having a conversation.

Come on, Triple H. We all know you have never had Koolaid in your life. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Triple H looks like the type of guy who responds to Waiters/Waitresses by saying, “Hi, I’m Triple H. I’ll be your customer this evening! ;)”
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Triple H calls Paul Heyman on claiming Triple H was embarrassed. Triple H says he went to war with Brock Lesnar and although Lesnar beat him, he didn’t walk away. He limped away. Triple H tells Paul Heyman that he’s going to beat the ever living crap out of him just to make himself happy and because he can. Curtis Axel gets in Triple H’s face then tells him that The Game around here has changed and if Triple H wants to talk to Heyman, he needs to talk to Axel first. Triple H slaps Axel down.

Triple H just used a Stephanie McMahon move
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

Annnnnnnd Curtis Axel is right back to Michael McGillicutty…Thanks Triple H.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Triple H says he changed his mind and that he’s going to have a match tonight with Curtis Axel and says when he’s done kicking Axel’s ass, he’s going to kick Paul Heyman’s.

Is it good or bad to have your first match against HHH?
— Tesha Wyatt (@HEELcanadian) May 21, 2013

You guys need to know what a Triple H burial is. A kick to the nuts = Burial. A slap to the face = This guy is going places. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Match 03: Alberto Del Rio vs. Big E. Langston

spanishspanishspanishEXTREMERULESspanishspanish ALBERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

DEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

The Crowd Can’t Do The Oooo’s With Ricardo. They’re Too Winded Sucking Down Sonic Shakes.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Gotta love that thug clap. ITS BOUT TO GET REAL.
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

AJ Lee still has a hard time skipping out to Hip-Hop.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Big E Langston’s gear is what Victoria’s Secret calls “cheekies”. #themoreyouknow #raw
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

Winner: Big E. Langston

LANGSTON WON?!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Match 04: Layla vs. AJ Lee

Divas!
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Hey! Layla’s back!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

I actually like how AJ looks so bored with her opponent when she’s in the ring.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Wow. Last time I saw Layla wrestle she was a White Chick. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Rolling Neckbreakers? That’s a New One.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

AJ Lee locks the Black Widow on Layla.

The Black Widow! That’s How It’s Done!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Winner: AJ Lee

She tapped the BUTT!
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

That’s how we tap now? Grabbin’ asses? #ikindalikeit
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Layla didn’t tap out, she spanked and squeezed. Restart the match. #raw
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

You know…I try to respect women’s wrestling & good matches & SHIMMER/SHINE & all that stuff, but Layla squeezing AJ’s butt was AMAZING!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Match 05: Cody Rhodes vs. Zack Ryder

Wow. RAW comes back with Zack Ryder vs. Cody Rhodes half way over? #WasteOfCodyRhodes
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

OMG CODY IS GOING TO WIN A MATCH!
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

I Hope Zack Ryder Is Able To Hit the Miguel on Cody Rhodes In This Match: bit.ly/13CPxsX
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Zack Ryder’s tights are getting serious now, too! Almost. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

CODY IS GOING TO WIN A MATCH!
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Winner: Cody Rhodes

he won! i’m happy!
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Cody Rhodes just defeated Trent Baretta
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Ryback’s theme plays and Ryback walks out to the ring.

Ryback? RUN CODY RUN!
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Why does Ryback’s shirt look like it was made in Clip Art?
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Zack Ryder’s Saying, “Are You Serious Bro? You Beat Me Up Last Week!”
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Ryback proceeds to destroy Zack Ryder.

HEY THATS THE INTERNET CHAMPION YOU CANT DO THAT
— Tesha Wyatt (@HEELcanadian) May 21, 2013

Why you gotta keep killing Zack Ryder? You obviously should be friends! You both have been wronged by Cena!
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Ryback, you’d benefit making a friend in Ryder. He hates Cena as much as you do.
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

Ryback carries Zack Ryder to the ambulance.

Ryback is such a pal, calling 911 for Ryder.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Ryback has developed a hobby off collecting jobbers. It’s like beanie babies.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Ryback throws Zack Ryder in the ambulance and it drives out of the arena.

Zack Ryder got Ambulanced! I invented a word. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

You mean the ambulance driver has been waiting this whole time? #RAW
— Stacey Heisenbert (@LittleSherbie) May 21, 2013

This would mean something if John Cena and Zack Ryder were still friends. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

The Sins of the Cena will be beared by Zack Ryder.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Match 06: The Shield vs. Kofi and Team Hell No

New Champions, New Vests. Everything’s Coming Up SHIELD!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

No army rolls with added championship belts? What do you think this is? #RAW
— Stacey Heisenbert (@LittleSherbie) May 21, 2013

Now that Seth Rollins is Tag Champs with Roman Reigns they have to come out together. He’s not happy about it.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns introduce themselves then Dean Ambrose calls them the Tag Team Champions. Ambrose says he’s the U.S. Champion and that The Shield brought the power back to these titles. Ambrose says Kofi and Team Hell No didn’t believe but they do now. Ambrose brings up The Rock, The Undertaker, Ryback and John Cena and says they broke them all down because they don’t believe in The Shield. Ambrose says that all of the WWE Universe’s Heroes go down by the “Swift Arm Of Justice.”

I hope the Shield gets ALL the belts. Ambrose gets WWE Championship, Rollins gets the IC title, Reigns is the new Divas champ…
— Chris Sims(@theisb) May 21, 2013

Seth Rollins says that he heard that “Justice Is Blind” but after last week Justice Can See Just fine. Rollins tells the WWE Universe can now see what a cohesive unit looks like and that The Shield is unbreakable. Rollins calls The Shield the future then says it’s just the beginning.

Seth Rollins and his raspy diner waitress voice again.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

Roman Reigns adds on by saying that the ending stays the same: You put people in front of The Shield and The Shield knocks them out. Reigns claims The Hounds Of Justice run the yard and carry the collars to back it up. Ambrose says the fire of justice is burning bright and they are to blame then ends his speech with “Believe In The Shield.”

Just once I’d like to pick up a phone call at work and yell ‘BELIEVE IN THE SHIELD!’ before hanging up. #RAW
— Stacey Heisenbert (@LittleSherbie) May 21, 2013

I believed in The Shield before Roman Reigns demanded that I do it. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Kane’s Explosion startles The Shield.

Dean and that fire. lol.
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

Kofi Kingston Gave Dean Ambrose the “Curt Axel” Slap!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

“I. AM NOT. THE WEAK LINK.” *fishhook* Awesome. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

Jerry Lawler just called The Shield an “in sync team.” Now I’m picturing The Shield doing N’Sync dances.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

The match is incredible!

Daniel Bryan is on FIRE.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Bryan/Rollins hot damn. And I thought Bryan/Ambrose was great.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Daniel Bryan is super intense in this match. Love it. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

That time you got two sodas from the machine when you paid for one. #TheShieldDidThat
— D. O’Brien (@Heinekenrana) May 21, 2013

Dean Ambrose Looked Like He Tried to Block the No Lock with His Tongue Slobber.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Everyone stop tweeting and watch this match!
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

Jeez but Daniel Bryan’s dropkicks still look like they will murder you.
— Chris Sims(@theisb) May 21, 2013

Angry Daniel Bryan is the Best Daniel Bryan.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

I dont want this match to end. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Reigns just KILLED Bryan.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Roman Reigns hits a spear on Kane for the win.

This match is bad for my health, hot damn.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Winner: The Shield

What a Great Match!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

That 6 man tag was just…Delicious #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

I want that every week.
— Mark Greg Sputnik (@TimWelcomed) May 21, 2013

Backstage: The trainer tells Triple H that he doesn’t get ready to compete. Triple H threatens to fire the doctor.

Go home Triple H, you can’t follow that.#raw
— Arya Stark (@prettyheartless) May 21, 2013

Does Triple H Use “Because I Can” When Making Executive Decisions Back in the Boardroom Too?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Triple H even buries the medical staff.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Backstage: Kaitlyn tells Natalya that she has her secret admirer’s phone number. Natalya asks Kaitlyn if she tried calling the number. Kaitlyn tells Natalya she did but he didn’t pick up and there was no voicemail. Natalya tries to get The Great Khali to snoop around, but Kaitlyn stops her then notices Cody Rhodes walking by and texting. Natalya and Kaitlyn whisper about Cody being the secret admirer until Cody Rhodes notices them and asks if there’s something wrong with his lovestache. Natalya grabs Cody and Kaitlyn steals his phone only to find out that not only is Cody Rhodes NOT the secret admirer, but he’s also posting pictures of himself on the internet.

Kaitlyn, Cody Rhodes is a Perfectly Cromulent Choice for You.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Match 07: Jack Swagger vs. Randy Orton

R-Truth is not allowed in Jack Swagger’s America.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Let it be known Khali beat R-Truth.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

@keepitfivestar don’t forget senior citizens vote in record numbers.
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

To Everyone Who Voted For R-Truth: You’ve Proven You Make Poor Choices and Do Not Deserve to Vote in Real Elections. #YoureWelcome
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

R Truth must feel like Donkey Kong right now. He’s just not a draw anymore.
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

Zeb Colter is dressed like the manager of Old Navy.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

@keepitfivestar Not a single “tarnation” “conflabbit” or “humpin’ horny toads” out of him yet? I’m disappointed!
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Randy Orton hits the RKO

An RKO, but where did it come from, Cole? Where?? #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

Winner: Randy Orton

I am so surprised. More to this match than I expected. Shame Swagger didn’t win.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Match 08: Triple H vs. Curtis Axel

Triple H still has the coolest entrance. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Hes Curtis, Curtis Axel. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

This is Why R-Turth Only Got 9%. He Was Freestyling Over Curtis Axel’s Theme on the WWE App.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

His theme song gives me feels.
— Melisandre Baratheon (@RitaHepburn) May 21, 2013

Paul Heyman should twerk to this theme. #ICouldTwerkToThis
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

How can you NOT love Curtis Axel’s theme? JTG and R-Truth are freestyling, Cameron, Naomi and Layla are twerking. It’s incredible!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

C’mon, McGillicutty. This is your Genesis. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

Curtis Axel’s New Theme Completely Overshadows Wade Barrett’s New Theme.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Curtis Axel and Triple H have the same tights designer. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Mike Chioda asking Triple H if he wants to quit.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

During the match, Triple H gets weak. Triple H leaves the ring then sits down in a chair.

When did a jaw problem lead to concussion like symptoms? #Raw
— Tyler Edwards (@Und3rAverageJoe) May 21, 2013

Triple H about to get that Goku heart disease.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Triple H drinks a water, douses it on himself, then tries to get back in the ring but can’t.

Triple H gets a second wind by pouring himself with the special water used in Space Jam.
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

Somebody give Triple H a Snickers and throw him back in the ring!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

@keepitfivestar Triple H eat a snickers. Why? Because you get like Zack Ryder when you’re hungry.
— Shay Mitchell (@ShayLMitchell) May 21, 2013

HE’S GONNA PUKE!
— Bill S. Preston, Esq (@Miss_Dani_Baby) May 21, 2013

HHH saw Beyonce do this at her concert. He’s about to power up.
— Powerline (@Osito1034) May 21, 2013

Triple H collapses as Doctors try to check on him but he refuses.

Is this a new trend? All top guys refusing medical care. Sham
— Tesha Wyatt (@HEELcanadian) May 21, 2013

Winner: No Contest

Doctor to Triple H: “I told you so!” #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

So Triple H loses to himself.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

Triple H Looks Like a Dog That Was Tricked Into Going to the Vet.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) May 21, 2013

Triple H is gonna get an Oscar before Leonardo DiCaprio.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) May 21, 2013

Curt Axel is the future in the sense that next #Raw might open up with him still standing in the ring, waiting for HHH to get back in. #WWE
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) May 21, 2013

So does this make Curtis Axel The Cerebral Assassin’s Assassin?#wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

Where did Axel even go in the end there? All we saw was HHH taking a shower and then a nap.
— Tesha Wyatt (@HEELcanadian) May 21, 2013

Axel? Heyman? They were never there. Triple H just came out and got a case of no-feel-good
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

RAW ends with Triple H being checked on by Doctors while the crowd chants “Triple H.”

It literally is all about The Game.
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) May 21, 2013

So That Happened:

#Raw ended with Triple H acting like a fish out of water. #wwe
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) May 21, 2013

That ending was pretty butt. Oh well Axel didn’t lose and that was a very enjoyable RAW.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) May 21, 2013

It literally made Triple H sick to put someone over.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) May 21, 2013

It literally made Triple H sick to put someone over.

Mon, 20 May 2013 23:11:55 -0400

It literally made Triple H sick to put someone over.

Somebody give Triple H a Snickers and throw him back in the ring!

Mon, 20 May 2013 23:06:59 -0400

Somebody give Triple H a Snickers and throw him back in the ring!

How can you NOT love Curtis Axel’s theme? JTG and R-Truth are freestyling, Cameron, Naomi and...

Mon, 20 May 2013 23:00:04 -0400

How can you NOT love Curtis Axel’s theme? JTG and R-Truth are freestyling, Cameron, Naomi and Layla are twerking. It’s incredible!

Zeb Colter is dressed like the manager of Old Navy.

Mon, 20 May 2013 22:35:30 -0400

Zeb Colter is dressed like the manager of Old Navy.

Seth Rollins and his raspy diner waitress voice.

Mon, 20 May 2013 22:17:42 -0400

Seth Rollins and his raspy diner waitress voice.

Jerry Lawler just called The Shield an “in sync team.” Now I’m picturing The...

Mon, 20 May 2013 22:01:16 -0400

Jerry Lawler just called The Shield an “in sync team.” Now I’m picturing The Shield doing N’Sync dances.

Fun Fact: Ryback is attacking Zack Ryder because he supports the Handsome Eve Torres. Ryback was...

Mon, 20 May 2013 21:41:29 -0400

Fun Fact: Ryback is attacking Zack Ryder because he supports the Handsome Eve Torres. Ryback was offended by Ryder’s song “Hoeski.”

Three Man Booth

I want Teddy Long to be a Playable Character in the next Tekken Tag Tournament.

*The Shield jumps Kofi until Randy Orton’s music plays* Orton: *Runs down* Wait guys! Let me...

Chris Jericho proves to Big Show why he was WWE’s Musical Chairs Champion.

Not sure if Big Show lost by countout or just gave up because he didn’t want to run.

Daniel Bryan could have 0 Life in a Zelda game and he STILL wouldn’t be a weak Link....

Highlight Reel: Goat Of Personality

One day Triple H will help out Curtis Axel (From our RAW Recap)

Jeri-Troll! (From our RAW Recap)

Politically Correct AJ Lee (From our RAW Recap)

We know, Seth. We know…(From our RAW Recap)

Triple H was suffering from “Goku’s Heart...

Ryback dresses like he’s in The Warriors (From our RAW...

3MB RAW Recap: 05/20/13

It literally made Triple H sick to put someone over.

Somebody give Triple H a Snickers and throw him back in the ring!

How can you NOT love Curtis Axel’s theme? JTG and R-Truth are freestyling, Cameron, Naomi and...

Zeb Colter is dressed like the manager of Old Navy.

Seth Rollins and his raspy diner waitress voice.

Jerry Lawler just called The Shield an “in sync team.” Now I’m picturing The...

Fun Fact: Ryback is attacking Zack Ryder because he supports the Handsome Eve Torres. Ryback was...

The Shield jumps Kofi until Randy Orton’s music plays Orton: Runs down Wait guys! Let me...